Cat Yawning

Geraldine the surgeon’s secretary must be a soothsayer. She said I’d get more tired as the days went by and boy, was she right! The Endo said I’d feel shitty, and although I wouldn’t go quite that far, I do feel a bit like a fire hydrant that’s been pissed on. I can only imagine that this is how you feel when you are old, not 40 old, but really, really ancient. My whole body is totally fatigued just like I’ve run a marathon or even two! 

The fatigue begins with some cat yawns. I really don’t know where these yawns come from. I’ve never yawned so big or hard in my life! I look like one of those big cats at the zoo who open their mouths so far to yawn that you think they’re going to dislocate their jaw! That’s exactly how I yawn and with similar sound effects. I’ve noticed recently that the cat yawning starts earlier every day. And you know, once the cat yawning starts, it’s all downhill from there. After a prolonged period of cat yawning, my arms and legs will ache as if I’ve just won an Olympic medal for Weightlifting and my voice will start to sound like a Frog who has sucked a whole helium balloon. Ah, the joys of living without a thyroid or Thyroxin. That’s the good thing about my cat yawning. It’s artificially induced (from the lack of not having a thyroid or Thryoxin) and it’s temporary.

What’s that saying about you only really appreciate something when you don’t have it any more. In hindsight, I wish I hadn’t dissed my thyroid as such a pointless piece of my internal machinery. It may have had it’s failings, but it did a good job! I miss it. A lot! I find myself fantasising about how high I’m going to feel once I’ve got that Thryoxin pumping round my system. What with that, and my radioactive superpowers, I’ll be like an overactive Engergiser Bunny.

In other news today,  it was the rough and the smooth.

The rough part was that the Brasserie bread company emailed to say that they too use iodised salt in their delicious products so it looks like I’ll be crunching through those cardboardy rice cakes a while longer. The sales lady ended her email with “So unfortunately it looks as though you won’t be able to eat our beautiful bread.”  Well gee lady, thanks for making me feel good. I always like to have the last word, so, I wrote back and said actually, I would  be able to eat their beautiful bread, just not for a few weeks! Ha! That told her!

The smooth part was I went to see my counsellor. It’s always a good day when I see her. I always get quite excited before – it’s a bit strange – I instantly feel better just knowing that I’m going! I love the way the time just flies by and how there’s just so much to talk about.  Maybe that’s the time for the verbal tsunamis. Whatever, today was no exception, and I leave there feeling refreshed, fully focused and ready for anything.

I often reflect on the things we talk about hours, days or sometimes weeks after. Today she asked me how do I really feel about being radioactive? Really? I really feel like it’s kinda cool. Crazy but cool. I know radiation is all dangerous and all, and look, the Nuclear Doctor said the treatment does have some small risks, like getting Cancer – but hey I’ve already got it! Doh! It’s a no brainer – this treatment is the best shot I’ve got at getting on the road to recovery. Will I take that little radioactive tablet, designed only for me? Hell yeah! Am I going to worry about it? Hell no. I’m just going to sit tight, stay snug and eat lollies and let that radioactivity get to work. I’d probably suck camel poop through a straw if you told me this was the best way to treat my disease. You’ve just got to do what you’ve got to do.

In other news, in an effort to extend my iodine free cooking repertoire I made a Tomato and Kumara Rice Salad which made a refreshing change from cardboard cakes for lunch, although trying to cook brown rice in the rice cooker was a comedy of errors.

I also made wicked Slow Cooked Mexican Lamb Shanks in the slow cooker – another iodine free delight. One of the good things about the iodine free diet is that we’re getting to eat things I wouldn’t usually cook, and finding that they’re actually pretty damn good. Neither of us are big fans of lamb but dinner was delicious (if I say so myself) and as I made a big batch, we had plenty to stash in the freezer for next week! I’ll be too radioactive to prepare meals for David, so this way, we can just do a lucky dip in the freezer and magic something iodine free but delicious up for dinner in no time!